Just Felt That Way.

Oh God, why do I always feel that I won't live long? Each day, I will always feel that something's bad is gonna happen and You'll take my life just like that. Every night, I'll never fail to think that what if I won't be able to wake up the next morning. Oh God, if You wanna take my life away, let me 'clear' my sins to the people that I've offended and especially You. Hope You'll allow me to live longer. I fear of Your punishment and everything You could do to me. Why do I feel that way everyday? Is it true that I'm not gonna live longer? And why every night I'm gasping for air? Its hard for me to breathe. Oh God, I'm not ready to face You. Please listen to me God, listen to every prayer I recite. I truly am not ready to face You as I'm too afraid of Your punishments. I guess I don't have to repeat that. I know You're listening. Please allow me to live longer. I'll learn to appreciate everyday of my life and not forgetting You. I can't promise but I'll try. Amin.

The Oprah Winfrey Show XX|||- 27

I watched the show on Monday(14.Dec.09) and i got inspired by that. I cried after watching a few chapters of someone else's life. How should I share.. Hmm well, kids/children/babies inspired me so much. Someone gave birth to a 'special' child but they called them the 'miracle' baby. They taught me enough how to actually appreciate life as it is. You should watch it(although its already over), I could not share that well or you wouldn't feel how i felt. The last story was about a baby named Eliot, a baby boy who was diagnosed with a disease called cancer. Unfortunately, he only survived ninety-nice days. Each day is celebrated with his lovely parents. They took three thousand photos of him for that ninety-nice days. With God blessings, his mum is now pregnant. However, Eliot is a wonderful child and a miracle baby, and of course will always be special to them. Thats what I could only share. Hope you'll appreciate life as it is. Thats about it. Thanks for reading! Wish you luck and God bless.

Miserable Life

Damn life's a bitch at times. Devastated, no one wants me. If have, they would just walked away like that. Oh God, if I'm not meant to be with anyone, I'll accept it, but at least let someone walk into my life with full surprises and show some love to me. I'm just sad that everytime someone walks in, he'll go that easily. What's wrong with me? What's not right in me? God, what else will you take away from me? I'll pray for the best for everything that comes to me. I'll always love you for whatever happens God but at least allow me to taste happiness. Maybe theres something good behind all these. I don't know, but I'll leave it all up to You God. However, I want a little freewill for my life. Allow me for that. Amin.

At last!

Got myself a new Toshiba NB200. Wooo, it has a nice keyboard. So freaking excited!

Last Minute.

Last minute decision is fucking making me headache. On Friday(which is today), I could not decide and make a choice. I could not decide to actually go along with my aunt's decision to just withdraw 100 bucks for re-pairment for my laptop which my uncle gave to me or another decision which was made by my other aunt to actually buy a brand new one. Oh God, can't freaking decide. Oh man oh man.



But in the end, my aunt called me. Just at the right timing? Okay, before I reach to my other aunt's place, she called and asked how much I withdraw, as well as telling me about a laptop that she saw which was having a sale. I got so happy. I made my way back to the bus stop to get to the nearest bank. The nearest i could get was Whitesands coz' I was at Pasir Ris. But the weather weak me out. It was so freaking hot. I was perspiring very badly. Haha! Oh ya, with a long sleeves on, I was like going crazy! But for the sake of getting a laptop. Never had it in my entire life! After 15years, Alhamdullilah. Thank Allah S.W.T for all the things he gave me. But if we stop worshipping Him, he could just take everything back anytime. That fears me. I was told by my dad when I visited him just now at eight plus in the morning. Huhuhu, I've typed so long, hands getting sore, actually no, my shoulders pain. Like so much! I will update on the routine of my life of someone elses' life soon. Bye now!

Ready to Mingle!

Currently not dating anyone right now. He's engaged without me knowing. Told me after a week it happened. Saying, he'll tell me if he were to meet me in person. Well, wish him good luck and God bless. But whatever to think about it. Theres plenty of fishes out there, just have to find the right one. Well, Good Luck Dude! But i'm a lil' disappointed and devastated.